Tire Kingdom ain't no Nordstroms.

It's official. I know Not A Thing about motor vehicles. Nor do I know what my Insurance Card looks like. Nor do I know how to read my Odometer, because really, why would I? Perhaps if I had listened to what people told me read the information pamphlet I got with my lovely car, I would know that the odometer and trip milage are NOT the same thing. Just like if you keep pushing the radio buttons while you have a CD in and playing, the CD will not move to the next song. Also it's very important not to try such tasks while driving on a busy highway as you MAY swerve into the next lane and realize that just as you are passing a cop on a motorcylce. Oh yeah, this girl is TALENTED!

We recently (and when I say "we", I mean my father), switched our auto insurance from Travelers to Americorp with Costco. Part of the package was that I had to go and get my car inspected again, so today after I got out of school at 12:15 (I love getting out early..I can not say that enough) I got to drive around like a moron find Tire Kingdom so that they could do the inspection.

I got to the place and I had to fill out forms, so I went to the car only to discover that the insurance card that my dad CLAIMS he gave me was not there. Excellent. So then I call him and he's all, "I gave it to you" and I'm all, "you definitely didn't" and we could have gone back and forth like that for awhile except I had actual things to do. Like get my car inspected and eat lunch. Because yes, eating and getting a car inspected IS more important that sewing up your patient's face.

I finally got all the information I needed for paperwork and took it back inside. I'm holding the clipboard and staring off into space (or something like that) when the guy calls me. "Ma'am. Ma'am. Ma'am. HEY I CAN TAKE YOU NOW." Woah, when did I become a "MA'AM"? I was pretty sure I had a few years of the MISS thing left! I CAN'T EVEN BUY ALCOHOL YET. DO I LOOK THAT OLD/TIRED/BAD?

From now on I'm wearing a sign around my neck that says, "still young" or maybe I should just stop wearing my clothing of Lacoste polo's and jeans. Yesterday I wore a blue polo and a white skirt and my friend tells me, "aww, you look like a mommy." What the heck!? The she goes, "well not like an old mom, but like a young mom with a baby or something....you're going to be a good mom." Excellent. So now my job really does follow me around in my life. Not only do I get to play mommy for a few hours a day, but now I dress like one? I'm SO going out and buying clubbing clothes ASAP.

Ahem. Enough stupid rambling and back to my Tire Kingdom hell. So the guy finally checks out my car and lets me know that I didn't read my odometer correctly. Then he starts asking me questions.
Guy: "So does this thing have side airbags?"
Me: "Yes, it has side AND curtain airbags."
Guy: "No, it doesn't."
Me: "Uh yes actually, it does. That's one of the reasons I GOT this car was because of the side and curtain airbags. See look, the sticker that SAYS that it does is right here."
Guy: "Oh. Most cars have the airbags on the door."
Me: "Can you check my tire pressure for me? I want to make sure I have enough air in my tires. Or can you just tell me how to do it?"
Guy: "Did the light come on?"
Me: "What light? there's a light for my tires? Where would that be?"
Guy: "I don't know, maybe you should read the manual."

Nice guy right? I'm pretty sure I just gave him all the evidence he needs to say that women aren't capable of being informed drivers. It's a good thing he didn't drive with me, because than he would think that we're not capable of parking correctly either.